Wednesday, February 28, 2007

Double edlebrock intake

Stream-lined, aerodynamically efficient, ergonomically contoured, sensible handling, 80- gigs of ear popping power. The ipod 80 gig video is one serious piece of machinery and it is my bitch. Why 80 gigs you ask? Who really needs that much space you scoff? Well, you better just stick with the nano then, junior. Maybe I want to hear that obscure song I only listen to once a year, but it is there if I want it. AVS video converter will switch all my videos over to ipod format. There are also tons of podcasts readily available. I suggest the Beer Boy Scout ( If you see me walking down the street, I can't hear you.


2008 Winter Olympics

I hearby announce the formation of the committee to formally move that sledding be included in the next winter olympics. However, after announcing this resolution it appears that there already 3 Winter Olympic sports- bobsledding, luge, and the new skeleton event. With this in mind the committee has hearby resolved that the dissolution of the association is imminent.

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Friday, February 23, 2007

R.I.P. Bryan

Take er easy up in dude heaven buddy.

I do em both for the sport


The little robot kicks ass

R2D2 is the unsung hero of Star Wars. He saves ass everywhere you turn. Not to mention he gets the whole shebang rolling by finding Luke. Time and again he consistently shows better judgment than the humans. Also he zaps an Ewok. But, I think the real turning point of Star Wars is the difference between what Annikan and Luke decide when their friends are in trouble. When Padme falls off the ship when they are chasing Count Dookoo in Part II ObiWan persuades Anikan to stay on the ship and not rescue her. When Luke learns from Yoda that Leia and Solo are in deep in Empire, he ignores Yoda's urgings to complete his Jedi training and goes after them. Sometimes the force requires you to go against the Jedi Masters better judgement.
George Lucas was the Grand Marshall at the Rose Bowl this year. I was reading a post from some guy who was channel-surfing and saw Vader leading the pack of StromTroopers down the streets of L.A. and thought the Battle for the Republic was on.

Big Brother

Heard a funny story at work today...
Apparantly someone had been stealing the instant mix coffee at work. So the boss goes to the security cameras. It turns out the old lady who cleans the place at night was heisting them. And not just a cup while on the clock, but a whole case. I don't know what the person thought those little black globes in the rooms were for, but smile you're on candid camera. And in a truly ingenious display of denying everything, one of the other janitors who was seen drinking a cup of the liberated booty was asked about it. He said he didn't even know what instant coffee was!


Friday, February 16, 2007

Some tunes, a flick, and a read

Cyberdiarrhea is proud to announce a new semi-regular, semi-irregular installment: a music, movie, and book review. If you need some ear candy while you're playing darts, or you're riding the subway and don't want to stare at the weird guy across the aisle, or you're looking to kick back for two hours we've got you covered. Heck, maybe you can do all three at once. That's why you've got two eyes and ears (Do the math!).
1.The music- Frank Zappa and John Lennon- Fillmore East 1971. John Lennon and Yoko Ono jam with Frank and the Mothers at one of the last Fillmore East gigs. The crew runs through 3 songs. The music has good variety. It is jammy and weird. Frank does an screeching band member orchestra conductor thing. (Yoko should have saved the yowling for then, but hey anything goes when you're jamming with the Mothers). Frank also whips out some bossin solos.
Good for: Crab walking, shotgunning beers, freaking out trick or treaters
2.The cinema-The Prestige. What's up with all the magic movies lately? I'm a gonna watch the Illusionist later, but I thought the Prestige was a good story. I heard after I watched the movie that David Bowie played Nickola Tesla. Not only did I not recognize him, but I can't even believe it now. Nickola Tesla did a lot of experiments with audio waves. He made a building rumble like it was an earthquake with a huge tuning fork at the right frequency. Some people criticized the movie for being cold and unengaging. Maybe, but the movie told a story and stuck to it. Also, magic is cool. Pull my finger.
3. The book- Korea Witness by many journalists. This is a collection of stories about Korean history from the journalists who were in Korea and covered the history. It covers 135 years and it is cool to see some of the changes that have taken place over that time. Many of the journalists tell about the same incident, but it is cool to get several perspectives on each moment. It tells about how dangerous it was to be a reporter during the Korean War. Of the 500 or so journalists that were here, around 20 were killed. Most of the journalists were ex-military and were pitching in to help the soldiers at different times. Now that the U.S. has signed the nuclear disarmament agreement with N.K. (good job morons, the U.S. had the same deal in 1999 for far less. It was rejected by the Republican congress in 2002) it might be more boring in the land of the Morning Calm. Inter-peninsula railway spanning to Europe within 15 years.
So, read, listen, and watch this shiznit.

Monday, February 12, 2007


While doing research on the worldwideweb recently, I encountered everyone's favorite mature mom banger, the MILF-Hunter. He goes out with his camera crew, meets chicks, and seals the deal for your voyeuristic pleasure. But is M.H. really cold calling these broads? Is there really reason to head down to your local gym, pool deck, or tavern and expect the same smooth sailing from a few ill-concealed double entendre lines? Possibly, but maybe not because the MILF-Hunter does it.
On MILFy's website is the following disclaimer:
"12. All performers are given the opportunity to be tested for sexually transmitted diseases at no charge to themselves within a reasonable amount of time before their performance. All activity is arranged and discussed in advance of filming and every effort is made to insure the health and safety of the performers and to ensure that their performance is a pleasant and enjoyable experience."
This means that arrangements to meet and greet are made ahead of time, not at the supermarket check-out.
Also, unrelated to the Hunter's credibility, but noteworthy is this following law recently passed:
"The original records required pursuant to 18 U.S.C. section 2257 and 28 C.F.R. 75 for all materials contained in the website are kept by the following Custodian of Records:"
This law states that all performers in adult movies must list their name, age, address, and other personal information to be available at public request that would be a stalkers dream if he got ahold of this. Needless to say, not too many people are wild about their real names getting plastered along side their big bukake scene. Plausible deniability was much easier as "Candy".
So, like Santa or the Easter Bunny, have a great time, but don't let your bubble burst if the spurious antics of one enterprising guy with a camera aren't the real deal. Don't let it ruin your fun either, though.

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Friday, February 09, 2007


I think if you've spent any significant amount of time around me, you've invariably heard me lament the decline of professional wrestling. Gone are the high flying theatrics of Superfly Snuka, the brazen audacity of SuperStar Rick Flair, and the serpentine antics of Jake the Snake. Now there are a bunch of nerds who just open their eyes real wide and shake their bodies and look like a bunch of Jersey guidos. What lack of imagination! However, there is still one venue where they be wrastlin', where the moves are high flying and it's not just a big soap opera. And it's coming from little ladies to the east. Japanese women's wrestling, or proresu (that's really what it's called), is exciting and enjoyable to watch. From the first bell these chicks are getting it on, doing some crazy high-flying moves, and bringing the suplex. Move over Hulk Hogan, here comes the Jade Tornado.

Monday, February 05, 2007

Ultimate Housewarming

The house got warmed right proper as did all of the participants. We jammed, we danced, we whipped out guts for a belly showcase showdown. Spilt beer puntiliously christened the SS mypad. The next day we hit up an ultimate frisbee game. It was a dog's dream as about 40 ultimaters backhanded, flicked, and hammer-threw dozens of frisbees about. Actually there was a dog there running around trying to get in the game. Here are my top five dog names:
1. Humpy
2. Killer
3. Charles Barkley
4. Barkey Anderson (go Tigers)
5. Ninja

Friday, February 02, 2007

Calling all partee peoples

If you are in the Seoul/ Incheon area Saturday swing on by my pad for a rockin pajama jammy jam.

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